My urologist’s office called the other day and explained that my scheduled appointment would now be done over the phone due to the coronavirus. One hour before the scheduled teleconference, I was instructed (via email) to administer my own urine test to avoid an office visit.
Simply go outside and pee in the front yard.
If ant’s gather: Its DIABETES.
If you pee on your feet: Its PROSTATE
If it smells like a barbecue: Its CHOLESTEROL
If your wrist hurts when you shake it: Its OSTEOARTHRITIS
If you return to your house with your penis outside your pants: Its ALZHEIMER’S
I wonder what I have to do for my blood tests?